Boy meets girl. Boy and girl fall in love. Boy and girl get married and live happily ever–boy and girl get a divorce.
When I was in high school I knew a couple who were madly in love, Dean and Bobbie. They were that couple that made you believe fairy tale love complete with Princesses and Prince Charmings does exist. Both in their early twenties, Dean and Bobbie were successful, attractive, adventurous, and best friends. Even though every girl I knew secretly wanted to end up with Dean, we all knew he and Bobbie belonged together. They were soulmates. Anyone else would be wrong.
In 2006 Dean and Bobbie had the most beautiful wedding and started their happily ever after.
I went to college and only saw them occasionally over Winter and summer breaks. They were still madly in love, still living the fairy tale.
After I graduated I realized I hadn’t seen them in a good long time. What do you do when you haven’t seen someone in a while? You look them up on Facebook. When I pulled up the names I saw one thing: DIVORCED.
I was STUNNED. They were so in love. They completed each other. There was a time when they couldn’t live without each other. WHAT HAPPENED?
Love is the most powerful thing in the world. If so many people believe in this, why can’t it seem to last forever?
Because we starve it.
A general principle in life on keeping something alive, strong, healthy is that you have to take care of it. You have to feed it. Remember those gigga pet things (sorry about the spelling!)- the electronic pet that died if you forgot to feed it one time? Hah! But in all seriousness how many of us got our gigga pet with the determination and devotion that our pet would live forever? Anyone still have a “living” gigga pet? Case and point.
I think we think and treat love as if it somehow is self sustaining. For years we never feed it, never give it nutrition and we wake up one day to find its just gone.
What is the key to staying in love? Feed it. What does love thrive on? ROMANCE.
Why is love dying? Because romance is dying. Romance doesn’t necessarily mean chocolates and hearts and poems. Romance is finding out how to make your mate feel like a million bucks. Not just once, not just twice…but for the rest of your life.
You may say, “I suck at romance! I am just not a romantic person, I don’t even know where to start with being romantic!”
Romance is something you can learn. And if you want love that lasts a lifetime, it’s something you’ve got to learn.
Love isn’t how much you say it. It’s how much you prove it true.
A really great book I found a while back is 1,000 Ways To Be Romantic. Literally exactly what it sounds like. Another great read on learning romance is The Five Love Languages. everyone is different, including what ways make us feel loved.
Just remember the key to romance is the other person. Find out what makes them feel special and what makes them feel loved.
Happily ever afters still exist. They are hard work, but the best things in life rarely come easy!
Cheers and best wishes to your happily ever after! 😊❤️