When you become a certain age you will often have people tell you, “It is time for you to start thinking about settling down.” Or maybe you start to think about this idea of “settling down” yourself.
What comes to mind when you hear the words, “settling down”? Sadly, right when I hear the words settle down the first thing that comes to mind is BORING. No more sporadic fun adventures. Life is OVER. I think a lot of other people might just feel this way too.
The good news is we are wrong about this notion that settling down means our lives are getting boring. People…we just make it boring.
What settling down actually means….
You are starting to take certain things more seriously in life….maybe you aren’t as “wild & crazy” as you once were. Things that weren’t as important to you are things that are becoming important. Maybe you are tired of renting and want to own a house or buy a piece of land, maybe you want to get married, get a job that will turn into a career…whatever it is, you are ready for a step that is more permanent than ever before.
There are AWESOME things that happen when you settle down:
- You realize to reach certain goals or if you hope to retire you must DO SOMETHING! YOU become a MOTIVATED individual. Motivated people have purpose!
- You are trying…and succeeding! People who succeed at things are confident!
- You are fulfilling dreams! Umm…who doesn’t love fulfilling dreams!?
- You are finding things or people that are AWESOME and hey, not just a one-time deal! Diamonds or crystal?
- You are probably earning more money than you ever have before in your life!! Do I need to say anything?
Why do so many us adults, who after we settle down, seem so miserable or our lives very boring?
I think it’s because when we think of “settling down” we literally throw all fun out the door with it. We literally think, or even tell ourselves, “My life is about to get boring. All fun and games are OVER.” We have this attitude, this belief that life is no longer going to be carefree and fun. And if we think that way…I think things will turn out that way.
Yeah, maybe settling down means you are “growing up” and you do have to take certain things seriously. But why do we think we can’t enjoy life, laugh a ton and have fun?
Instead of thinking we are “settling down” why don’t we think of it as “settling up”?
Tips for SETTLING UP (but of course can be used at any time in life!)
Stay in shape. Please, please don’t let yourself go. It isn’t fair to who you are with or to yourself! Make being healthy a priority…you will NEVER REGRET IT!
Become an adventurer. An adventure honestly is just doing new things for the sake of doing them. Go to a new coffee shop, hike up a mountain, stay in a ritzy hotel, camp in the backyard, help out at the soup kitchen, read a book, travel to a new spot… be active!
Don’t OVER-SPEND! Over-spending or biting off more than you can chew and getting in debt leads us down a dark spiral straight to adulthood misery. We have this the bigger the better mindset…always thinking THINGS buy us happiness. Nope! If you have less money troubles and a smaller house you will be less stressed out and hey…happier. You don’t need to bury yourself in a half a million dollar loan (unless you can afford it, awesome!). There is beauty in simplicity.
If you get married…marry someone who has common interests. Not everything of course…what is the fun in that!!?? But big things like religion, attitude (I think the other person’s attitude about life should be a top priority! Don’t marry someone who is often very, very negative!), and similar life goals are all things you should have close to the same ideas about.
Learn not to “Sweat the Small Stuff.” Why do we make a big deal about stupid things? There is a great book about this topic, “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff…And It’s All Small Stuff.” If you have time…read it!
Make time for people. You don’t need a million friends to be happy, just a good little group. Be a good friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, mom or dad, spouse by giving people time, really listening and making them feel important and special.
All about attitude. A good life really is all about your attitude. Your attitude will affect how you view and live your life. YOUR ATTITUDE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE. Your attitude will affect your marriage, job, kids, and YOU. Your attitude will get you through the bad times and make the good times better.
Don’t settle down. Settle UP!