Have you ever met someone that has eyebrows that look they have been carved by angels? I was never that person. When I was younger, my eyebrows were like two wild spindly forests that grew whichever way they saw fit. And if they had their way, they were forests whose dream was to meet in the middle and form into one BIG forest. When I was really little I thought when I grew up I would magically have perfect eyebrows. Soon enough I found out that was a fairytale and I was introduced to tweezers. I felt like a lumberjack with the amount of work I had to do to keep my foresty eyebrows tidy and still with all the work I did, I always seemed to “tweeze” too much or too little. It was a life-long struggle.
My roommate I called “Mer” had perfect eyebrows. They weren’t too thick, they weren’t too thin, they had a nice arch that framed her pretty blue eyes perfectly. When I was putting on my makeup next to her in the bathroom I enviously looked at her eyebrows and asked her how she had got them so perfect. Was it just in the genes? It had to be…she must have inherited the perfect eyebrow gene.
“I wax them! It is the best thing ever!” She exclaimed excitedly in her North Carolina accent.
“Wax? Oh, I’ve always thought about getting that done but ya, I’m sure I would just have to tweeze them the next day so I don’t know if it would be a good idea.”
“They actually don’t grow back for about 3 weeks! It’s amazing!”
Three weeks!!!!????? Translation: heaven
“You should totally get it done!” Mer said happily.
“I should, you know I think I will.”
At the Salon….
I sat in the chair my head leaned on the back, my eyes nervously darting around in anticipation. I was freaking out. The salon I was at was in the mall near the college, I had taken my sister Andrea and my best friend Vicky with me for moral support but at the current moment I was alone. Andrea had been snagged by one of those people selling makeup in the little booths in the middle of the mall, (You know those little booths with straighteners, beauty products, cell phone covers, sunglasses that are right in the path of where you need to go. They have the most dedicated sales people…I tell ya! Sometimes I pretend to be in deep conversation on my cell phone when I walk past them!)and Vicky was at Starbucks.
I tried to think about anything else than what was about to happen to me. I was about to have about 100 plus hairs ripped from my head….all at the same time. The pain we are willing to endure for beauty…
The hairdresser that was preforming my waxing procedure returned with her weapons-I mean waxing tools. She had jet black hair that was as straight as a pin, she wore burgundy lipstick and had drawn on eyebrows with extreme arches…which I should’ve taken as a warning signal.
“You ready hunny?” she asked in her deep voice.
Could anyone ever truly be ready for this kind of pain? I let out a deep breath and tried to focus on the prize: perfect eyebrows like Mer’s and not tweezing for three weeks. “S-su-re.” I reminded her over again that I had never had this done before and just wanted the brows cleaned up and a touch up on the shaping. Nothing drastic. She seemed confident in her abilities.
“Just close your eyes, your eyebrows are gonna look great!”
“Will it hurt?” Yes…it was a stupid question to ask.
“It just feels like a li’l pinch,” she said the lie they must all be told to say and I closed my eyes.
She slathered on the thick gluey warm wax just above my eyes. I heard her tinkering around and then she laid little papers across my eyebrow. This was it. I held my breath and squeezed my already closed eyes even tighter.
The pain was sharp and intense, making me catch my breath. At least it was over-
RRRIIIIPPPP! What is she doing???? !!!!
She began to go to town. The pain wasn’t as intense anymore, now it just had the sensation that my entire skin surrounding my eyebrows was on fire. I squeezed the arms of the chair as she finished up, attempting to push through the pain by trying to focus on how lovely my eyebrows would be afterwards.
The ripping and tearing stopped.
I popped open my eyes, hesitantly, as if I was going to be staring into the face of the boogey man.
“All done hunny! And your eyebrows look GORGEOUS! Let me just put some of this cream down to reduce the redness,” the stylist said triumphantly.
“Oh! Here’s a mirror so you can get a good look of the new you!”
She held up a small mirror over my head. I looked at myself, and I certainly was a new person….a new person with NO EYEBROWS! I double took….wha-at? What did this woman do to my
eyebrows????? Where did she take them??? I looked harder…Oh look! There’s something there…I think. She had literally removed every last eyebrow hair I owned except for a pencil thin straight line. No arch. No depth. My eyebrows were a speck of a line. Oh yeah, and there was blood-apparently she had taken some skin out while she was at it.
I looked scary. Traumatized, I paid and left in a daze, praying I would not see anyone I know in this mall. My skin was on fire and I was sure it was so red it looked like it was on fire. I searched for Vicky and Andrea and found them at the makeup cart where Andrea was being subjected to a makeover. I wanted to put my hands over my barely existent new eyebrows, I wanted to hide them.
Andrea, Vicky and the makeup artist turned around and just stared.
“They’re horrible…I don’t know what happened…she ripped them all out…I don’t know what to do!!” I cried.
Vicky just put her hand to her mouth and Andrea was like “There, there.”
The makeup artist looked at me and my red skin and skinny little eyebrows. “Oh my word!! You should demand your money back!” She said, “I will go with you…she totally ruined your eyebrows and you shouldn’t be paying for that!”
I did end up getting my money back, explaining that I had no eyebrows left. The woman didn’t protest…she didn’t even say a word…just handed me back my money, like she knew what she had done.
I had to buy this special makeup to fill in what was left of my eyebrows so I wouldn’t scare people until they grew back.
Tweezers for life…(one day I might try waxing again…I know it works for a lot of people!)
Have you ever had a traumatic eyebrow waxing/threading or bad hair cut/style experience?